drafting a goodbye letter for when I move away…
Nic,
This is not a letter of stalking, harrassment, fear or whatever else you may try and make it out to be.
This is not an email to profess my undying love for you, or to try and rekindle what we once had, or to try and get you to help me understand how your feelings changed so quickly. I feel the time for these things passed after your actions to our last contact. I realised that it was time for me to move along with my life as you have with yours. I threw the dice one last time, and the results were shown.
This is an email to notify that I have moved away on my own from the area.
I will never understand your actions towards me.
You professed never ending love for me, as well as eternal friendship.
Which turned into isolation, to a lack of compassion, to hate.
I will never understand that the person who I once loved would ever treat me this way, especially when I was working towards what we discussed on the phone in early April. And especially since I never gave you any reason to fear or to hate me. It just seems like once you were finished with what you needed, I was no more use or someone that you felt to give any compassion or understanding.
I realise that you have fallen in love with someone else, but I will never understand your lack of compassion for someone who still loved you and who you apparently loved so much only months ago.
I don’t know why, but I do wish you luck in your future with your new partner. I hope he gives you as much love as I once did, because you would have found someone truly worthy of your love. I hope I also find someone worthy of my love one day. The only positive to draw from this on my side is that I have realised that I can love someone unconditionally.
I am a survivor like yourself, but I know that this situation will take a long time for me to repair myself to be able to ever trust anyone as much as I once trusted you – a trust that was shown to be unworthy in the end.
I cannot see myself ever forgiving you at this stage. You have turned out to be a completely different person to who I thought I knew. I will never trust you again, though as promised, if you ever need help in the future I will be there to assist you. Just because you have turned into someone I am glad that I am not with, doesn’t mean that I couldn’t feel compassion for you if you ever needed it.
Goodbye
Leave a Reply